Chuck vs His Brain
by WafflemanX
Summary: Scenes and events on the Chuck multiverse, but from his brain's point of view.
1. Barstow

A/N: This is my first attempt at fanfiction, so get your guns blazing for reviews! I want to thank MySoapBox for giving me courage to do this and for betaing this madness. Logic, Common Sense and Pleasure belong to Rod M. (a GREAT Ranma author). His idea is the father for this line of storytelling.

Chuck vs His Brain

Chapter 1: Barstow

**Real World:**

_As light shines on the run down motel room, there is a different glow on a specific room. Inside, there are two bodies on a bed. Chuck is, for lack of a better term, spooning with Sarah. Their hands are intertwined and moving lazily. _

**Chuck's Brain:**

_Upon first look, the control center to Chuck's Brain seems oddly familiar. Imagine NASA Control Center, but in a pink shade. All around, people are scurrying about, but the atmosphere is a calm one. Further inspection details that the people are all dressed as Nerd Herd employees. Their faces are familiar, yet somehow unrecognizable. In the middle sat three chairs. These chairs, while not thrones, were big and comfortable looking. The chairs overlooked the entire control center. The chairs were placed in a triangular shape, giving the head chair more of a vantage point across the control center. The chairs were occupied at the moment, by three similar looking persons. _

Common Sense was sitting on the head chair, drinking his regular brain juice. You could see a striking resemblance to Chuck. His uniform looks worn, but clean. On his left, Logic was seated, a spitting image of how Chuck would look as a Vulcan. Logic is seen writing on his journal, trying to figure out how to access that damned memory space hogger on HIS brain banks known as the Intersect. On their right, sat Pleasure. He was the spitting image of Chuck, but with Hugh Heffner's pajamas. He was still asleep at his chair.

"Sirs! Right Arm reports that Feel Senses are picking up something!!" said one of the employees.

Common Sense, feeling a little panicky at being disturbed from his calmness, ordered the Right Hand to probe out the sensation, while alerting the Senses for further input.

"Eyes Department, check in!"

On screen, the image of the Eyes Department Manager came into view.

"Sirs! We need a moment to focus the retinas, sirs!"

"Damn! Right Hand, report on the feel status!" ordered Common Sense.

"Sirs! He's is definitely touching another hand, sirs!"

This information woke up Pleasure faster than a neuron can fire. Sensing this as a possible contact with THE GODDESS (as Sarah is known in Chuck's brain), he yanked Common Sense out of the main chair his chair and sat down in less than a microsecond.

Looking at the floor, Pleasure directed his attention to Common Sense. "Common, this info gives me priority for control! Logic, agreed?"

"Correct Pleasure....Common Sense, you should relegate control to Pleasure." said Logic.

Getting up, Common Sense sighs.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious! Very well....it must be the Subconscious Section showing of another dream probably...and the boys at the Feel Department must be getting restless....Helm is yours, Pleasure."

Pleasure smiled like the Cheshire Cat.

"Eyes reporting in sirs, we have visuals."

"Put it on screen, boys."

**Real World:**

_Chuck opened his eyes to see blonde hair close to his face. _

**Chuck's Brain:**

"Oh...my!"

No one saw who said that, but all could see on the screen was that blonde hair was right in from of HIM. Common Sense and Logic froze. Pleasure could not believe it. Common Sense reacted first.

"This _**must**_ be a dream. No need to go to Panic Level Omega."

"Logical assumption, Common," said Logic

"Logical...HIS Ass!" said Pleasure.

"Right Hand, caress the GODDESS's hand. If Common Sense's right, I am going to enjoy giving HIM a good dream sequence!!" said Pleasure.

**Real World:**

_Chuck continued to caress Sarah's hand, playing with her fingers, until he sees Sarah staring directly at him. _

**Chuck's Brain:**

"Sirs, Nose reporting in....we smell lavender, and something else...but we haven't confirmed it yet with the Memory Department," reported the Nose Department Manager.

"Logic, get your lackeys to confirm that smell, that is YOUR department!"

"Pleasure, my people are not lackeys, and I resent that..."

"Logic, sir!" came a similar looking Vulcan, but this one looked like Sarah would look as a Vulcan. "The unknown smell is the GODDESS's scent!"

"Sir, Feel has requested the release of endorphins and testosterone to relieve pressure building in the nervous system!!!" said one of the control center techs, looking closely like Morgan.

"Sir, WE HAVE VISUAL CONTACT WITH THE GODDESS!!!!" cried the Eyes Department Manager.

"On screen...NOW!!!"

On the screen, everyone on Chuck's Brain could see that the GODDESS was looking directly at HIM, with longing in her eyes. Everyone was transfixed on the screen.

Suddenly alarms were going off all across the control center. Klaxons were heard from the speakers. Alerts came from every screen on site.

"Warning.....Sensory Overload will commence in 30 microseconds! Warning.....Sensory Overload will commence in 30 microseconds!"

Logic, in an uncharacteristic move, slammed his hands on the Panic Level Omega button.

All the lights were gone for a second. Suddenly, everything was bathed in a red glow.

"Oh, crap!" said Common Sense.

"WARNING .....WARNING....CONTACT WITH THE GODDESS HAS BEEN ACHIEVED, WE REPEAT, CONTACT WITH THE GODDESS HAS BEEN ACHIEVED!" blared across Chuck's body on the speakers. Chuck Nation was on HIGH ALERT.

"I will _**not**_ go down as the instinct that blew this opportunity! Hands, _**carefully**_ grab the GODDESS's head! People, we are about to commence Operation Kiss!!!" cried Pleasure at the top of his lungs.

"Adrenal glands, release 45% of adrenaline output. Somebody better be flowing testosterone already! Lungs! Why haven't we raised the intake ratio?! Groin area, respond!"

Everyone scurried as Pleasure barked orders across.

"Pleasure, calm yourself, or you are going to go into brain arrest and take HIM with you," warned Logic.

Common Sense, for once, woke up from the shock, just in time for Operation Kiss to begin.

"Guys, we need to let program instinct KISS-ALPHA run...."

"Agreed," said Logic

"...Thank you...." said Pleasure

Common Sense, Pleasure and Logic stood and walked to the back of the control center. They stood in front of a intricate looking machinery. It had a similar look as the intersect cube, but with a difference that were the keyboard should be, there were three key holes. The three of them took out some sort of key from under their uniforms and placed them on the corresponding holes in the console.

"On three," said Logic.

The three of them turned the keys clockwise and the machinery came to life.

"Please select instinct program to run," said a computerized voice...sounding a lot like Ellie.

"Instinct program KISS-ALPHA, verification code CS-01."

"Instinct program KISS-ALPHA, verification code LG-02."

"Instinct program KISS-ALPHA, verification code PL-03."

"Verification confirmed...commencing program KISS-ALPHA."

**Real World:**

_The spell that held both Sarah and Chuck fixed on each other breaks, and they lunge at each other. They begin to kiss passionately, with all the longing and love they have for each other. Within a few minutes, Chuck feels that Sarah begins to move her hands under his shirt. _

**Chuck's Brain:**

Everyone is on High Alert. The Brain is running on autopilot, since Instinct program KISS-ALPHA was activated.

Suddenly, a report comes in.

"Sirs, Torso indicates that the GODDESS is caressing their vicinity," cried a squeaky voiced tech.

"Yes, this is it boys....it's going to happen!!!" screams Pleasure.

"Wait...we need to stop this for a second....we're missing something," cried Common Sense.

"ARE. YOU. NUTS!!!" Pleasure was radiating enough energy to power LA alone.

"Do you want to impregnate the GODDESS?"

Collective gasps were heard all around the room. This was serious, very serious.

".....damn you...."

"Override Instinct program KISS-ALPHA....." said Pleasure

"Logic, find out from the Memory Department where the hell we keep the condoms," said Pleasure

A/N: And we'll leave it at that. Drop me a line if you liked this story and, if you want me to do a similar take on an event of your choice....even an event on one of your stories. Sort of like MST...but different. Hope you enjoyed it! Now….review….c'mon…you know you want to….even if it's to destroy me or get back at me!

PS: Wepdiggy, don't kill me…I couldn't wait!


	2. The Intersect Room Part 1

A/N: Thank you all for your great reviews! "They make me feel great, smarter, more aggressive. I feel as if I could…as if I could…TAKE ON THE WORLD!" Brownie point to whoever knows where I got that line from!

First, let me give a warm Thank You to MySoapBox (who, without her guidance and support, I would drabble like a eight year old) and Wepdiggy, (go, my friend, go!) which without their input, this would not have been possible. Also to lucky713 and SK85, who gave me the theme for this and the next chapter. Then the following thank yous': _SarahLisaWalkerfan101, Yokaputo, Poa, Mindcheater, Kryptonian250, Joe, 007chuck, rachelanne6791, c165, jusafan_ and all others which I forgot to add.

Logic, Common Sense and Pleasure belong to Rod M. (a GREAT Ranma author).Thank you sir!

For true enjoyment of this and next chapter, see Chuck vs the Ring, and pay close attention (as if you haven't!) to the scene when Chuck enters the Intersect Room until the end. And now, without further ado…

Chuck vs His Brain

Chapter 2: Intersect Room, part one

**Real World:**

_Hundreds of screens glowed through clear acrylic, filling the entire room with a harsh white light. Just by the look it it, this room serves a special purpose. There is a soft hum coming from a workstation located in the middle of the room. This hum is interrupted by a large sound, as Chuck falls, feet first, into the floor. _

**Chuck's Brain (Red Cell Cafeteria):**

_The cafeteria looks like any regular cafeteria, albeit a clean looking one. This particular cafeteria has pinkish organic color to it. Inside, there are few personnel from the control center, having dinner. Common Sense is on one table, enjoying his proteins, while talking to Red Blood Cell #15._

"Sir, is it wise to be here, while the GODDESS is dancing with HIM?" asked RBC #15.

"Of course! This is more Pleasure's scene. Plus, Logic is with him. What could go wrong?"

Suddenly, a yellow light engulfs the cafeteria and a voice, mysteriously similar to Ellie's, can be heard from the PA system.

"All RBC, please report to the Adrenal Glands, this is not a drill…All RBC, please report to the Adrenal Glands."

"Oh come on! Just 360 seconds of peace. What did they do now?" sighed Common Sense.

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

When Common Sense arrived at the control center the whole room was ablaze with flashing yellow lights. Pleasure stood in front of the main chair, looking a little frantic.

"Did you cut the PA system from the cafeteria, like I asked?" spoke Pleasure to techie #17 (Morgan lookalike).

"Yes sir, I mean, I think I did sir!?"

"If you didn't, I'll be hearing CS coming in 5…4…3…2…"

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!!!" screamed Common Sense, as he entered into Pleasure's view.

"CS, relax, you don't want to have indigestion."

"Where. Is. Logic?!" growled Common Sense.

Just then, Logic came down from the Memory Department into the control center, arm in arm with Memory Deputy Director Gammah (Vulcan Sarah).

"…and then Common Sense relieved himself on his uniform! I found it quite fascinating."

"Oh Sir, you tell the most interesting stories!" said MDD Gammah while smiling.

"So Logic, care to tell me why we have a code yellow on here without you or me present?" said a very sarcastic and pissed off Common Sense.

Logic froze. MDD Gammah pulled her arm from Logic, and scurried up to her department.

"I was researching how much space we had acquired since the removal of the Intersect." Looking at Pleasure rather coldly, or as cold as Logic can show, he said, "I was not aware of the code yellow in effect."

"Guys, everything is under control. HE needed some adrenaline boost, so the Legs Department wouldn't crash when HE fell."

"_**Why**_ are we falling? Never mind! Eyes, on screen," barked Common Sense.

**Real World:**

_Chuck begins to look around, when he hears Bryce. "Hello Chuck," said Bryce._

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

"Sirs, incoming transmission from EARS," alerted techie #17.

"Analysis?" asked Logic.

"Sir, it seems it is…" and techie #17 gasped.

On screen, Bryce Larkin could be seen, sitting on the floor, with his back to the wall.

"Bryce Larkin, may he get syphilis," said a displeased Common Sense, while everyone in the control center spitted to the ground in disgust.

"CS, let me handle this. Speech Center, patch me up on the main chair," ordered Pleasure.

**Real World:**

"_Hey, Bryce. Casey and Sarah are pinned down outside"_

"_I'm on it."_

_Bryce leans in pain._

"_Oh my God, oh my god, oh my god, you've been shot!"_

"_Yeah! "_

_Gasping for breath, Bryce says, "I'm really sorry about this Chuck"_

"_No, no…it's ok. It's ok, you're going to be fine. It's not that bad…"_

"_Take care of her."_

"_Don't, don't say that. You're not dying. She needs you man, ok? You…you guys are going on missions together and…and…and do exiting things and save the world. You'll be a team again and it'll be great."_

"_She wasn't gonna come. "_

"_She wanted…"_

_Bryce winces from the pain._

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Everyone's attention is on the screen as the events are unfolding. Logic taps on his badge id.

"Gammah, record separate video from the last ten seconds and send it to Analysis Room 5. I want to analyze the conversation when this is finished."

MDD Gammah's voice cracked as she spoke "Yes…sir…*sniff*…right away sir."

**Real World:**

"_Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on!"_

_Bryce takes out the surge device from his jacket_

"_This will destroy the Intersect. This new computer's too powerful. It's too dangerous."_

_Bryce hands over the surge device._

"_But you need…you need the computer to fight FULCRUM!"_

"_FULCRUM doesn't matter, alright? They….they're just…ah…they're just one part of the RING. They'll use it against us, Chuck. You have to do this. All right? You have to destroy that computer…then get out of here…"_

"_But you can beat them…you're a real hero….Bryce…"_

_Bryce exhales his last breath._

"_Bryce?"_

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

There was not a dry eye on the control center…or in all of Chuck Nation for that matter. Common Sense was the first to speak.

"System parameter change: Bryce Larkin will now be known as 'Bryce the Hero' from this day forward."

No one dared or wanted to oppose that order.

"Gentlemen, we need to do something about the Intersect," whispered Logic.

"Legs…move HIM to the workstation, on the double. Adrenal Glands, up the outflow by 25% Lungs, fill those oxygen levels," ordered Common Sense.

**Real World:**

"_Oh my god."_

_Chuck gets up and moves to stand in front of the Intersect, the surge device in hand when he reads what the screen of the workstation is showing._

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Pleasure spoke first. "Guys…are we thinking of doing what I think we're going to do?"

"We need to upload the Intersect" said Common Sense, while staring off into nothing.

"I beg your pardon, but that statemet is not a logical decision. The probabilities of HIM being in danger are 99.912399812398123%. We already took the _**thing**_ out. Father is safe. Momma Bear (Elli as known in Chuck Nation) is safe. "

"Logic, the good guys need the Intersect to fight FULCRUM, or whatever evil organization is behind all this. Do you think the Family will be safe? Do you think the GODDESS will be safe? Logic, it is the **correct** decision," said a somber Common Sense.

"It is not logical. You cannot imagine how that… _**repulsing **_…thing took over _**MY**_ department. How it utilizes _**all**_ resources at will. My team went into overdrive anytime that...**_thing_**…activated."

Logic taps on his badge id once more.

"Gammah, access the Brain Vault, record #03123123-B to 03124305-F. Re-route it on the main screen."

On the main screen, multiple videos could be seen, but as the videos played, they were not the videos that Logic requested.

"Gammah, why am I not seeing the records requested?" asked a serious Logic.

"Sir, I apologize, but I am in agreement with the Instincts," said a nervous MDD Gammah.

The scenes displayed on the screen were:

HIM, saying: "I can't figure out why Bryce did this. Why he chose me?"

The GODDESS, saying: "You can do anything. I've seen you in action."

Bryce the Hero, saying: "You can't put him out in the field. He won't survive!"

General B*tchman, saying: "It's time for you to become a spy."

HIM, saying: "I'm just Chuck Bartowski, not a hero."

The GODDESS saying: "How many times do you have to be a hero to realize that you _**are **_that guy."

Everyone in the room was in awe.

Softly, Logic speaks, "Gammah, you really think so?"

"Yes, Logic. I'll help you...all in the department will help you."

"Very well" sighed Logic.

"For the safety of Momma Bear," said a confident Pleasure.

"For the safety of Awesome, the Bearded One and Father," said a determined Common Sense.

"For the safety of the GODDESS," said a neutral Logic.

"Go."

A/N: And that is it for part one. Yeas, I know…I'm an evil bastard. But wait until part 2 comes in…it's gonna be a blast!

As usual, please review…I crave nourishment.


	3. The Intersect Room Part 2

A/N: Again, thank you for all of your reviews. I never thought people would like this idea. I know I stated that the Intersect Room was going to be a two chapter story, but the muse gave me such ideas (and with the suggestion of MySoapBox, gave me MORE ideas. You were right! Speaking to oneself DOES help!). This will probably be a three chapter story. After that, I'll do scenes requested by you fine people. Right now, I have the shower scene from vs the Fat Lady, The unforgettable Dock Kiss Scene , the Bartowski Eyebrow Dance Kiss Scene, The Only a Transfer of the Vaccine Kiss from vs the Ex scene, and of course, the Vicky Vale / First Date scene. Who knows? Maybe do a poll?

A small clarification: I know you guys think they are original, but Logic, Common Sense and Pleasure (the original trio) are not mine. They are the creation of Rod M (a GREAT Ranma author). I just did a revamp and Chucktized them. So, credit's due where credit's due. Some parts and from Chapter 2 forward…those are mine, and free to share!

Of course the Thank yous'. MySoapBox for being my mentor (or is it mentress?) and my first beta. Master, I am but a humble apprentice. Wepdiggy, who is my second, but not less important beta (Go, my friend..the muse has and will inspire you!). SK85 and Lucky713 for the damn idea which does not end. And to all my reviewers who let me know how much they've liked this and the readers who favored this story. Without further ado…

Chuck vs His Brain

Chapter 3: Intersect Room, part two

**Real World:**

_Chuck places his right hand, palm open into the activation console of the Intersect. The words "Intersect Activating" flash on the screen, while a green progress bar fills up. The Intersect cube begins to spin faster and faster, glowing with a soft, blue light. _

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

"Ok Logic, what next?" asks Common Sense.

"We need to prepare the Brain Vault and the Memory Banks for the upload. Common Sense, I'll need every available tech you can spare. Pleasure, I need control of the Hypothalamus and parts from the Right Hemisphere. We need to process and store the data as fast as possible. If not, the flux will be too strong and the data stream will force HIS mind to reboot. We cannot go off-line while the GODDESS and Colonel Hardass are pinned outside."

Pleasure tapped his badge.

"Lackeys!"

"Yeah boss?" said Lackey #15; he looked like a cross between Jeff and Lester.

"You heard the constipated Instinct…leave skeleton crew Zeta and move your asses over to the Memory Department!" barked Pleasure.

"But boss, it's casual drinking Saturday, today…"

"Don't make me go in there and subject you to Jeffster 24/7!"

"On it boss!"

"Your turn, CS," snickered Pleasure.

Common Sense pushed a few buttons on the console in the main chair and a weird looking microphone came out. He tapped it and feedback sounded over the PA system.

"Attention people of Chuck Nation. We need all available techies on the Memory Department. Intersect upload will begin in 200 milliseconds. Time is precious. Everyone else, please consider lowering energy consumption. We will need every little bit for the upload process. All vacations and leaves have been cancelled until further notice. All working cells report to your stations. This is not a drill. Failure to comply will result in the immediate relocation to the Colon-E. For the GODDESS and the future of Chuck Nation!"

Across the Chuck Nation, all voices sounded as one. "For the GODDESS and the future of Chuck Nation!"

"Logic, all yours."

Logic pressed his badge."Gammah, prepare the linkup from the Eyes and Ears Department. Reroute recent memories to sections QTDSAE thru ZSERRDF. Suspend all non vital processes. Convert monitoring stations to processing stations using code beta protocol. Eyes, calibrate main optic nerves Alpha and Beta to direct the data stream to the Main Memory Switchboard."

"Yes sir!" came the voice of the Eyes Department Manager.

"Ears, linkup directly to the Main Memory Switchboard. Bypass processing functions. We will process them here."

"Logic, sir! Is it wise to…?"

"You heard the man…do it!" yelled Pleasure.

"Yes, yes sir!" shouted a nervous Ears Department Deputy Manager.

"We need to move this operation to the Memory Department" announced Logic. "We need to be ready for the data stream."

"Relay all communications to the Memory Department. Skeleton crew will stay here. Everyone else, with me. Dorkan, you are in charge." ordered Common Sense while looking to techie #17. "People, lock and load. Move out now!"

**Chuck's Brain (Memory Department):**

_The Memory Department was a sight to see. It was a giant warehouse, where one end could not be seen by normal means. Various large screens were stationed on the upper part of the walls. They showed various videos of Chuck's life...memories. On the floor, thousands of desks were lined up in vast rows and columns. Computers and monitors sat on the desks and glowed with a bright hue giving an eerie appearance to the whole room. Cables connected everything to everything; in short, a geek's dream. At the entrance to the Department, was a large region of space occupied by two distinct desks. One was a mahogany desk, about 12 feet wide, which had a console, larger than the main console in the Control Center. Twelve holographic monitors were floating on top of the console. The second desk had the same look and feel, although it only measured 6 feet wide. The console in the desk was much smaller and had only three floating monitors to it. On this desk, Gammah was seated furiously typing away._

"Gammah, status report?" ordered Logic as he approached his desk.

"Sir, Eyes and Ears are in-sync. We are waiting for confirmation of the data stream. Non vital processes have been suspended until further notice. Unneeded memory stored on the oldest data banks. RAM cache flushed. All analysis rooms are being used as processing points except room #5 as requested, sir!"

"_Sir?_ I thought she called him Logeeee" Pleasure was interrupted as he was pulled by his shirt collar to be inches from Common Sense's face.

"Not now Pleasure, or so HIM help me…" said a VERY stressed Common Sense.

"Eep!"

"Understood. Thank you, Gammah. Connect me to the upper screens; I need to confirm that everyone is ready for the upload," said a tired looking Logic.

Gammah pressed some commands on her console to fill Logic's request.

Logic reviewed the screens and nodded his head in approval. "Thank you everyone for your help. In a few seconds, we will be receiving the data stream for the,". A pause. "…Intersect. As we have learned from past experiences, there will be large amounts of data that will need to be stored on the Brain Vault. This data will be encrypted and hard to decode for RAM utilization and analysis. Also, if we do not process the information at the same speed of input, the Mind will need to reboot. We cannot let this happen. For those reasons, we will process everything in real time and store the information accordingly using our encryption algorithm. This way, the Mind will be able to handle the stress and we'll be able to analyze the data without losing consciousness. As usual, there is a risk involved, but it is necessary for HIM to protect the Loved Ones. Thank you."

Across the Department, shouts of "Yes Sir!" ad "Hell yeah!" were heard. After the cutoff, Gammah walked from her station to Logic's desk.

"Logic…I mean Sir! In order to successfully do that, the data stream has to have a first filter processing. We don't have that capacity."

"I will be the processing filter. I'll send you the secondary streams, so you can relocate the proper resources."

"But Sir, you will receive the whole stream. We don't know how that will affect you."

"It has to be this way, if we are to be successful. Success rate is 95.912341234%"

"Yes, sir"

Before Gammah returns to her station, Logic grabs her arm. "Thank you."

"Welcome, sir."

"Oooo…Logic and Gammah, sitting in a" Pleasure cut himself short as he saw Gammah's eyes look at him. Upon changing from one set of eyes to another, Pleasure felt nervous when he saw Common Sense looking at him. But Pleasure felt fear, when he saw Logic's eyes. He never saw so much lack of emotion. Then something changed and he saw pure raw emotion on those eyes; not even on his own eyes in the mirror has he seen such a thing.

**Real World:**

"_Activation Complete"_

_The white glows from the screens in the room fade to black. The only light is the blue one emanating from the spinning Intersect cube. Suddenly, every screen flickers to life with an image. Each screen changes randomly from an image to a different image. "Intersect uploading" can be seen on the workstation screen. Chuck's pupils dilate and begin to move in an intricate pattern._

**Chuck's Brain (Memory Department):**

All hell breaks loose. Logic's hands are moving so fast, they seem as if there were more than two at the console. The console itself seems kind of a blur. Logic's head is moving spastically, as he keeps focusing on almost all the screens in his desk. Gammah is moving close to the speed of Logic, but not quite. Everyone in the warehouse is typing furiously on their terminals. Some techies are fainting on their desks, quickly being replaced by more personnel. A tremendous heat began to emanate in the Department.

"Control Center, patch me to the hypothalamus, we need to cool down the Memory Department" ordered Common Sense. "Control Center, come in! Dorkan, come in! Hypothalamus, come in! Any Department, come in?!"

Common Sense and Pleasure looked at each other and ran out of the Memory Department and down the stairs into the Control Center.

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

"Sir, thank HIM you arrived! Communications thru the nervous system are being disrupted by the data stream. Sir, we can't communicate to any part of the body!" said techie #17.

"Crap! Now what?" asked Common Sense.

"We use Greased Lighting," said a smiling Pleasure.

**Chuck's Brain (****Main Artery Hall****):**

_Personnel in the Main Artery Hall were scurrying about. Since communications throughout Chuck Nation were disabled, all the Departments were depending on messengers. Personnel were running from one department to the other. Amid the chaos, a honking sound could be heard, followed by a sound that could be described as a old worn lawn mower. In the distance, a single blue moped was driving about._

"Out of my freaking way!!" screamed Pleasure while honking on the horn.

Common Sense, with an oversized helmet and a VERY reflective vest, had his arms around Pleasure in a death hug ™.

They turned the corner and found a multitude gathered in front of a checkpoint. White Blood Corp soldiers were stopping everyone, looking for infections.

"We are not going to make it on time" said Pleasure. He began to revv up the moped, with intent to pass thru, no matter what.

"Wait. Let me try something." said Common Sense. He took a large breath before screaming: "Is that the GODDESS naked?" while pointing to the right. "Quick, go to the left!" yelled Common Sense to Pleasure. People frantically jumped out of the way of the moped, fearing that they would be run over by it.

Pleasure took the lead and ran the moped as fast as he could while everyone else, including the WBC were looking to the right, trying to see if the comment was true. They sped up past the checkpoint, while the WBC, noticing it was a ruse, followed them thru. Two WBC motorcycles followed the moped, sirens blaring behind them.

"This should help us clear the path to the Hypothalamus" said Common Sense.

"Dude, there is hope for you yet!" exclaimed Pleasure.

In no time, they had arrived at the Hypothalamus.

**Chuck's Brain (****Hypothalamus****):**

_The Hypothalamus was a circular room, with a large cylindrical glass tube in the middle. The tube was filled with clear liquid and large purple molecules float together in the middle, forming a shape resembling a DNA structure. A large screen on top of the tube declared: __98.6 degrees Fahrenheit / 37.0 degrees Celsius.__The rest of the room looks like a pinking organic laboratory. Machines were all around , displaying facts and information. Personnel were going from machine to machine, taking notes while focusing on the screens. Suddenly, the front doors opened, revealing two tired Instincts._

"I'll take care of the WCB, you go fix this!" said Pleasure.

Gasping for breath and looking pale, Common Sense stepped forward asks to no one in particular: "Who is in charge of this section?"

"That would be me, sir!"

A distinctly familiar, yet generic looking person walks into Common Sense's view. He seems more muscular than your regular managers, but he projected a surprising charisma.

"I am Brain Cell Evan, in charge of the Hypothalamus, Sir! Sirs!" corrected himself when he saw Pleasure walking behind Common Sense.

"Very well Brain Cell Evan, we need you to drop the temperature on the Memory Department. We are heating up over there." informed Common Sense.

"Sirs, the dropping of temperature is a very dangerous procedure. But, as I am a temperature doctor, I know the ways of the temp."

"We understand, but we need to cool down the Memory Department now. HIS safety depends on it!"

"Oh, in that case, let's do it! Awesome!"

**Chuck's Brain (Memory Department):**

_Multitude of images flashed and changed at an incredible rate. Pictures and sound, images and text, all merged together into one flow of data. Suddenly, two of the screens flashed and the data flow broke into the individual images and texts. They disappeared from the screen. _

"Something's wrong. The data stream has changed configuration. The encryption is different. This is a new protocol. Not even the Dark Intersect behaved this way." said Logic to himself. "This may have been a mistake."

Everyone in the Department was sweating profusely. Some of the personnel were fainting not from being overworked, but from heat exhaustion. Some stations were beginning to shut down from overheating. Gammah interrupted Logic's concentration.

"Logic, I can't reach Common Sense or Pleasure," said a very tired looking Gammah.

"I cannot worry about that. I must try to decipher this new protocol. This development could hinder the success rate and the mission."

"Understood" said Gammah, not knowing if Logic was actually talking to her.

Cool air began to flow from the air ducts on the walls of the Department. The temperature began to drop in a slow rate at first, but then accelerating to a chillier temperature. People began to breathe easier. The computers malfunctioned less frequently. Everything was coming into synchrony again.

"Way to go Boss!" cried one of Pleasure's lackeys.

A/N: And this is it for Intersect Room part two. I hope everyone is still interested in this experiment. I will try my best to finish this story on the next chapter. Of course, reviews are EXTREMELY welcomed, and help with the muse (She's a sucker for reviews). And please, give me ideas for next chapters.


	4. The Intersect Room Part 3

A/N: Again, thank you for all of your reviews. At last I finished this part! The pressure that other authors were putting out chapters and I was behind. *shudders*. I know this chapter is longer that it should, but I didn't want to split it anymore and I wanted to finish this scene.

Logic, Common Sense and Pleasure belong to Rod M. (a GREAT Ranma author).Thank you sir!

Of course the Thank yous. MySoapBox for being there for me and guiding my thoughts. Wepdiggy for his invaluable advice. SK85 and Lucky713 for the damn idea which at last ended. And to my reviewers and readers who let me know how much they've liked this. Without your support, this would have ended three chapters ago. Without further ado…

Chuck vs. His Brain

Chapter 4: Intersect Room, part three

**Chuck's Brain (Memory Department):**

The drop in temperature had worked. The few failing systems were coming online and into synchrony with the switchboard. All available terminals were being occupied by personnel. But Logic's face had not changed since the warning.

"This new protocol has no usage for memory manipulation. Why is this protocol embedded on the data stream?" Logic was talking to himself.

"Logic, sir! We have a breach of security on the Survival System," yelled Gammah amid the ruckus in the Department.

"What? Impossible. Gammah, relay your functions to technical office Wanna. I want to know who is breaching the Survival System."

"Yes sir!"

"_This could not be at a worse moment",_ thought Logic. "_The new protocol is creating subdirectories in the Memory Structure, but no apparent function. And the breach in the Survival System; this is not a coincidence. Damn the Intersect! Remain calm. Center_."

"Sir, the breach, it's coming from the Memory Department! Subsection DEFAS233. It's one of the memory allocation sections of the Intersect!" reported Gammah

"_I hate to be right"_, thought Logic.

"Someone get Common Sense in here!"

**Chuck's Brain (Hypothalamus):**

Common Sense was anxiously waiting for Pleasure and BC Evan to finish their conversation.

"So you see, if you infuse the protein with the ginseng molecule, you'll get much more performance."

"Really!" exclaimed a rather interested Pleasure.

"We have no time for this. Pleasure, we're needed on the Memory Department," spoke a exasperated Common Sense.

"Fine, fine, let's go! Thank you again BC Evan. I'll try that protein shake thing," said Pleasure.

Both Instincts walked out of the Hypothalamus building and got on Grease Lighting. Two WBC officers were waiting besides the moped.

"Officers, we need an escort to get to the Memory Department. ASAP!" ordered Common Sense.

"Yes, sir!" came the reply from the officers.

"Finally, I can finally drive you without getting a ticket, my beauty!" snickered Pleasure while caressing Grease Lighting.

**Chuck's Brain (Memory Department):**

"Gammah, as soon as Common Sense and Pleasure arrive, I want you to go with them to the Survival System. Here, take my key," ordered Logic, while removing his key from under his shirt and handing it to her.

"But sir, the key, this is…" Gammah was interrupted by sounds of sirens.

As if on cue, Common Sense and Pleasure burst thru the front doors of the Department.

"There's no need to fear, Pleasure's here!"

Gammah was getting fed up with Pleasure. "_He is an Instinct, you cannot kill one of HIS Instincts. He is an Instinct,"_ thought Gammah, while walking over to the Instincts.

Hollers and cat calls where heard sparsely throughout the Department.

Common Sense looked at Logic. He looked extremely tired and almost without strength. The upload was taking a toll on him. Common Sense was headed to him, but saw that Gammah was coming over.

Directing her attention to Common Sense, Gammah spoke. "Sir, we have found a breach in the Automated Survival System. Somehow, the Intersect is trying to access the Control Center."

"Can it do that?" asked Common Sense.

"We don't know. That's what we need to find out," replied Gammah.

"But Logic's unavailable. We can't access the Survival System without him," said Common Sense as-a-matter-of-fact.

"Gammah is my proxy. Find out what you can. I have to recalibrate the filter for the new protocols. It seems to happen only on certain sections of the data stream," answered a weak Logic.

"Proxy Status?" asked Pleasure. _"Oh my, this is becoming most interesting by the nanosecond,"_ thought Pleasure to himself.

"Let's move out then" said a neutral Common Sense.

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

_The Control Center was in chaos. Even though only the skeleton crew was on the Center, the place was packed. Messengers from all the other departments were handing out requests to Dorkan (techie #17). Dorkan was pulling on his beard._

Common Sense arrived first.

"Dorkan, status report!"

"Sir, we have 141 requests from all Departments. The first request…". Dorkan was interrupted by a serious Common Sense.

"Hold on to those requests. We will address them when the upload is complete," said Common Sense.

"But sir"

"Understood?"

"Yes sir!"

"Messengers, go back to your Departments. We will re-establish communications shortly and will process your request afterwards. Now go!" barked Common Sense.

Fearing the famous "Common Sense's Wrath" coming into town, all the messengers got out of the Control Center in a timely fashion.

"Gammah, Pleasure, with me"

Pleasure opened his mouth, but resisted the urge to say what he had in his mind, as he valued his life at that moment. Gammah was a scary cell.

The trio walked into the back part of the Control Center, where two days ago, they had initiated the KISS-ALPHA program. As they reached the console, Gammah noticed that instructions were already running on the screen on the console.

"Sir, the breach is in progress!" said an agitated Gammah.

"Quick, enter your keys!" ordered Common Sense.

Common Sense and Pleasure took out their keys. Gammah already had hers in hand. The trio inserted their keys and followed the procedure.

"Please select instinct program to run," said the Ellie sounding computerized voice.

"Diagnostics Check, verification code CS-01"

"Diagnostics Check, verification code PL-03"

"Sirs, what do I say?" asked a nervous Gammah.

"Same as us, but say Proxy Gammah for LG-02, got it?" said Common Sense.

"Diagnostics Check, verification code Proxy Gammah for LG-02"

"Verifying, please wait"

"Verification confirmed. Do you wish to log out current user?"

"Current user?" asked Pleasure.

"Computer, open keyboard and show log status of last entries," said a confused Common Sense"

"Access Denied."

"WHAT?" came out of all three.

Suddenly, the lights went out.

**Real World:**

_The images on the screens are changing at an increasing rate. All of a sudden, the screens fade to black momentarily before filling the entire room with a harsh white light. Chuck staggers against the Intersect workstation._

**Chuck's Brain (Memory Department):**

Bright green text glowed on all of Logic's screens. Upload complete.

"How can it be? I didn't see any closing containers. I better check." Logic was cut short when the power went out.

"A reboot was not needed. Why is the Mind rebooting?" Sensing dread, Logic reached for his pen light on the pocket protector.

The power went out and came on again.

"The others," Logic muttered silently while he ran for the Control Center.

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Darkness engulfed the Control Center. A girlish shriek was heard.

"Why is the Mind rebooting? I thought Logic said we didn't need the reboot?" asked a curious Common Sense, while looking for his pen light on his breast pocket. Having found it, he clicked in on and was surprised to see Pleasure in Gammah's arms, clinging to her, while a shocked Gammah stood open mouthed.

The scene was priceless.

The lights came on. Systems were coming online. Gammah was getting tired of holding Pleasure.

At this moment, Logic arrived. As soon as Gammah saw Logic, she unceremoniously dropped Pleasure.

"Logic, what in the Bearded One's grape soda induced nightmares, happened?" asked Common Sense.

"The upload was complete, but I do not know why a reboot was needed. Fortunately, we were prepared for the eventuality, so we should be suffering only minor delays in functions."

"People, status and damage report! I want to know what is going on with HIM!" barked a angry Common Sense.

"Systems are online. Communication's online. Eyes Department report slight double vision. Other Senses report online. Legs Department is compensating for the Mind Reboot. Speech Center is still coming online. No further damage reported, sir!" answered Dorkan.

"Very well…good job people!" said a relieved Common Sense.

"Gammah, go back to the Memory Department and give me status of memory space and allocation," spoke Logic.

"Yes sir!" In seconds Gammah was out of the Control Center.

Pleasure tapped his badge. "Lackeys, return to post. I want to know how we are faring."

"Yeah boss!" came the reply.

"Sir, we have visuals!"

"On screen" said Common Sense.

On the screen, a fuzzy image of the Intersect workstation could be seen. Upon readjusting, the words Upload Complete became clear.

"We need to destroy the Intersect. Right Hand, verify we have the device given to HIM by Bryce the Hero and insert it into the Intersect," ordered Common Sense.

**Real World:**

_Chuck gets up and with the surge device in his hand, he proceeds to insert it into the Intersect. Alarms begin to blare from the workstation. On the screen, "Warning" followed by "Power Surge" is displayed. Electricity arches from the workstation, dancing across all screens that compose the room. On the workstation, the words "System Failure" flash right before the screen cracks. The Intersect Cube glows a bright red, before bursting in a white light and burning out. A sound of a door opening is heard._

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Cheering can be heard from all around Chuck Nation. In the Control Center, most of the personnel already had returned from the Memory Department and were congratulating each other. Smiling faces and laughs were seen all around. All around except for three people.

"It's done. But at what cost?" asked Common Sense to no one in particular.

"Did you finish the diagnostics on the Survival System?' asked Logic to Common Sense.

Pleasure was uncharacteristically quiet. That meant one of two things. Either something bad was about to happen, or he was missing a date with some cell. Pleasure was not looking at his watch.

"Incoming transmission from the Ears sir!" said Dorkan.

"Put them on," said Common Sense.

"Sir, we believe the sound of a door opening is coming in."

"Crap! Eyes, on screen now!" barked an even angrier Common Sense.

**Real World:**

_Chuck looks up from the workstation when he hears the sound of the door. In comes the agent who betrayed Casey__ with a gun. _

_The agent asks Chuck, "What did you do?"_

_When Chuck does not respond, the agent raises his gun at him and repeats, "What did you do?"_

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Panic began to flow through the Control Center. Common Sense reacted first.

"Logic, forget about the Survival System and plot a course of action with a high probability of escape. Dorkan, call the Adrenal Glands, we need 50% adrenaline in the system. Lungs, I need to increase the oxygen flow by 30%. Move people!"

"CS, this is a Survival Scenario, we need to activate the ASS," said a worried Pleasure.

"The Survival System could be compromised. We cannot depend on it. Logic! Where's my scenario?" replied Common Sense.

"I am working on it. The RAM cache is still being flushed from the upload. I'll need 4.5 seconds."

"Crap! I'll buy us some time. Patch me thru the Speech Center."

**Real World:**

"_I destroyed it. You're too late," answers Chuck in a wobbly voice._

"_For that, you'll die last!" says the agent._

_From the outside, more agents come in, bringing Sarah and Casey, both handcuffed, at gunpoint. _

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Everyone gasped. On the screen, the GODDESS was being held at gunpoint.

"We need to inform the GODDESS of Bryce the Hero's condition" stated Logic.

"Agreed, but we need to do it quietly," said Common Sense.

**Real World:**

_Chuck captures Sarah's attention. He moves his eyes toward Bryce, which she follows._

_Recognition dawns on Sarah._

"_Bryce?"_

_She drops down to him._

"_Bryce? Bryce?" The agents pull her up. She resists. "Bryce? No, wait! No! DON'T YOU TOUCH HIM!"she screams. An agent carries Bryce out of the room. Sarah is pulled, and then pushed towards Casey. Both are held at gunpoint. Sarah looks at Chuck. _

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

The Chuck Nation flet the anguish of the GODDESS as one. No one moved at that moment except for Pleasure.

Pleasure took control of the main chair. Somberly, he ordered, "Speech Center, mute the vocal cords. This message is private."

**Real World:**

_Chuck mouths, "I'm sorry"._

"_There is nothing left!" said the lead agent._

"_So you lose," said Casey._

_The leading Agent grimaces and walks towards Sarah and Casey. The other agents surround Chuck._

_Directing his attention to Casey first, then to Sarah, the lead agent says, "You should know this. No one stops us. No one ever has!" A half smile creeps on his face._

"_Who are you?" asks Sarah._

"_Spies, Agent Walker, spies". The lead agent raises his gun toward Sarah. "The best"._

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

On screen, all the events taking place are watched by the Chuck Nation. On the Control Center, some of the personnel began to cry. Others fainted. The situation looked grim.

"CS, he's going to shoot the GODDESS; we need to do something!" cried Pleasure.

"I…I…I don't know," stammered an incoherent Common Sense.

"Logic?" asked Pleasure.

"I do not know. We cannot activate the Survival System, or it could corrupt and we would go into reboot. It will be the end of HIM as well."

Suddenly, the light went out and Control Center was bathed in a red glow. From Logic's badge, Gammah's voice was heard.

"Logic, we have a situation. The Cortex has activated. The Brain Vault is accessing the intersect storages. I think it is a flash, but nothing like we have seen before!" she yelled.

"Oh, crap!" Pleasure ran over to the main chair and pressed a few buttons. Feedback echoed across the PA system.

"Everyone to their stations. We are under an Intersect Flash. I repeat we are under an Intersect Flash."

Everyone knew what was coming. The whole Control Center rumbled and shook like it was being hit by an earthquake.

Amid the rumbling, Logic ran for the Memory Department.

"I need to control the flux. Call me if anything arises." And Logic was gone.

Common Sense was in a stupor, mumbling, "I..I..I"

Pleasure slapped Common Sense. "Get your stuff together mister! We are not abandoning HIM OR the GODDESS!"

While Common Sense reacted, Pleasure looked at the Survival System. He noticed a program running in the screen.

"What the…" Pleasure ran to the machine. He began to see the code on the screen and then he felt it. Pleasure was not always the best of the Instincts, but when he felt something, he was always right. A smile crept into his face.

"For once, I'm happy that blasted thing's in HIS head!"

Pleasure tapped his badge.

"Logic, whatever you do, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT stop the Intersect from what it's doing!"

A larger shockwave rumbled in the Control Center.

"Are you mad, Pleasure! We need to…" Pleasure interrupted Logic.

"Trust me."

Silence.

"Very well."

Within nanoseconds, the voice of the Survival System could be heard coming from the machine.

"Verification confirmed...commencing program KUNGFU."

Everyone was rocked back and forth in the Control Center. Pleasure took a seat in the main chair, buckled on, took out some 3D glasses from his robe, which he put on and said, "Engage!"

**Real World:**

"_Sir, you should look at this!" _

_The lead agent walks over to Chuck._

_Sarah, recognizing Chuck's facial features asks, but knowing full well the answer: "Chuck, did you just flashed?"_

_The lead agent, looks closely at Chuck, who's still coming out of the flash. _

"_He uploaded it"_

"_Oh Chuck me!" growls Casey._

_Sarah looks at Chuck, dread on her features._

_The lead agent orders, "Kill him"_

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

The shockwaves subsided and the Control Center stopped shaking. Pleasure spoke.

"Dorkan, damage report?"

Stunned, Dorkan weakly checks his workstation and answered, "No damage reported, sir!"

The red glow continued on the Control Center.

"Folks, I take it we are not in charge yet, so strap in and enjoy the ride!"

At hearing Pleasure's statement, everyone quickly buckled their chair restraints.

From out of nowhere, Pleasure takes out a tub of popcorn. Still with his 3D glasses on, he offers the food item to Common Sense.

"Popcorn?"

**Real World:**

Chuck, in one fluid motion, disarms all of the agents. Then he cartwheels away, and finishes with a jumping back flip.

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Everyone was amazed at the action they saw on the screen.

Common Sense regained his composure but was still somewhat shocked.

"Since when do we kick? Since when do we flip?!?!"

Smiling, Pleasure answered, "We, my brother, are better than the illegitimate lovechild of Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris!"

**Real World:**

_Chuck lands from his jumping back flip and looks at his hands. He lifts his eyes towards Sarah and Casey. Sarah looks amazed at Chuck. Casey just stares in shock. Chuck sense movement out of the corner of his eyes, and stands ready. He rolls forward, delivering a punch to the abdomen of the agent to his left. Then, while getting up, he delivers a right chop to another agent. He turns around and does a side kick to the head of a third agent. He spins around and delivers a blow to the chest of another agent. Forward kick. Left Chop. Right Backhand. An agent tries to kick his head, but Chuck ducks and delivers a front kick to the incoming agent. He then backhands an agent coming from the left, while capturing the punch from an agent to his right. He flips over the agent who he had in the arm hold. He then clotheslines one more agent, leaving only the lead agent. They trade kicks and punches, until Chuck connects a blow to the chest following with a kick to his solar plexus. The lead agent gets thrown from the kick against the wall and slides down to the floor. Chuck looks around and notices that every agent is down._

_Casey can only reply "Uhhh"_

_Sarah looks at Chuck a mix of shock and amazement. She stumbles to ask__: "Chuck?!"_

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Everyone in the Control Center cheered. Pleasure munched on his popcorn, while Common Sense looked on, mouth agape. Logic and Gammah are entering the Control Center.

"Now THIS is better than Pay-per-view!" chuckled Pleasure.

"What in the name of Tron is going on?!" asked a confused Logic.

"I don't know, but the freaking Intersect activated the ASS and kicked butt!" replied a smiling Pleasure.

"The GODDESS asked something," spoke a bewildered Common Sense.

"Let me handle this. I have the perfect comeback."

**Real World:**

Chuck says, "Guys, I know Kung Fu."

**Chuck's Brain (Control Center):**

Loud groans were heard from the Control Center.

"What?" asked a satisfied Pleasure.

A/N: And that's it for this story. Next, on Chuck vs His Brain, we take a look at Chuck vs the Ex. I mean both the Jill meeting and the Casey Kiss?!?!?! Hilarity ensues!

Please review…I felt like chapter 3 was not very well liked.


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